The Measure of a Mom

I've been having a lot of discussions with others and myself lately about self-worth and my role as a mom. With all of the availability of information these days we are bombarded with how every mother "does things". Of course most people only present their good sides online and so it's easy to start the comparing game and come up far short of ideal.

Our ancestors only had other family members as a gauge on motherhood, which in a way is good as family shares many of the same ideas, beliefs, worldviews, etc so one is mostly to be encouraged with that comparison. But when you start looking at how people from completely different backgrounds, beliefs, socioeconomic groups and even countries parent, you are bound to be discouraged. There is no way any one person could meet the ideal of so many different points of view. In fact if you believe as I do, there is no way to achieve ideal at all. So often I catch myself praying and asking God to make me a better mother and then realize that my prayer really should be "make me a good mother". Without Him I am completely selfish, self-centered, and manipulative of my family. I need Him in order to point my kids to Him.

Recently a list of what an Abiding Mom looked like was going around the social network. I printed it off and pasted it on my wall. It's a great reminder of all that truly matters in life and in our role as moms. That said, what do we do about all that other things we have to make decisions on that aren't of eternal importance, but are still important (i.e. education, health, meals, discipline, extra-curricular activities, etc.)? Like I said before, a hundred years ago there just weren't many options and a young mom simply did what her family had always done in regards to the business of life. Now with all of our convenient technology we have more choices and options then we know what to do with and yet we all want to feel like we made the best decisions and "did right by our kids".  Of course once we decide something it becomes what is "right" in our minds in order to meet that need of doing the right thing for our kids. By default then any other choice has to be wrong. This phenomenon has caused divisions in families, churches, and communities. I don't have the answer to the question "How do we allow for a multitude of choices and still be confident in the rightness of our own?"

That leads to my question how do I measure myself as a Mom outside of eternal things if there is no "right way" OR should I not be measuring myself by anything else then by how I point my kids to Christ and all that that entails? That is so hard for me as it's not easily quantified and measured (which is totally how I think). I do though want most of all for one day both my God to say "well done good and faithful servant (Matt 25:21)" and my children to "rise up and call me blessed (Prov 31:28)". I just need to be reminded of that and trust in God's leading and equipping of me in the everyday. I heard once that one really doesn't get to see the "results" of how you did as a parent until your kids are parents. That is a long time!! One thing is for sure... being a parent has forced me to pray and rely on God sooo much more then almost anything else I've encountered in life.





In other measurements... the girls had their checkups last week. Both are completely healthy with no developmental concerns. :)

A is  38lbs and 41in (75% in both areas)
K is 14lbs 6ozs and 25 3/4 in. (K definitely has more rolls then A did at this age. But still only 75% for length and 50% for weight)

Baby K is already starting to out grow her washpod. :(

She really is a sweet happy girl and so excited to be upright.